REVIEW: SOMEWHERE CAFÉ, HARRODS
Middle Eastern Juggernaut Crowns Harrods with First UK Restaurant
Somewhere over the Harrods, way up high, there’s some food that we dreamed of in London from Dubai.
We head to the suitably opulent launch of the Middle Eastern destination’s first UK outpost, on the fourth floor of the capital’s most exclusive department store.
Its deliberately ambiguous name reflects the melting pot of cultures in its wonderfully diverse and colourful dishes and interiors.
We leave Harrods’ endless warrens of sparkle and luxury, and enter a warmly lit new world, where sandy, burnt orange and earthy tones are splashed with hints of verdant green, evoking the Middle Eastern landscape.
The tone is set by a musician, playing soothing Arabic music on an oud.
The restaurant’s themes of luxury and travel are celebrated by the event’s partner, Aspinal of London, which customises leather luggage tags for us, and presents us with prints of their scarf designs to paint, with three of the best winning the brand’s beautiful designer handbags - I will kick myself for eternity for chatting too long to finish my doodles.
In keeping with its UAE and Saudi roots, the restaurant is proudly no/low alcohol, which is very welcome this Dry January. And their excellent Somewhere Cocktail (available in passionfruit, watermelon and lemon) makes it easy to swerve the booze.
We take our seats and the endless succession of artfully presented mezze dishes arrive for our tables to share, taking us on a foodie journey across the Middle East.
Colourful bowls of creamy, dreamy beetroot, guacamole and Black Angus Beef hummus stud the table, in Farrow & Ball pink, green and cream.
We devour giant bowls of kale tabbouleh with fresh tomato and pomegranate, crowned with ribbons of crispy Lebanese markouk bread. And we dollop our plates with moreish spoonfuls of their soft green lentil salad with tomato, spring onions and crispy bread.
Highlights include their short rib kebba - Middle Eastern croquettes, which are light and crispy on the outside and stuffed with juicy meat and yoghurt - and their fluffy bao buns, filled with grilled Wagyu, cranberry sriracha and zesty, crispy onions.
Our table’s mobile phone’s are aloft, when our charming waiter presents their teetering pyramid of beetroot rice and beef tenderloin shawarma, and tops it with creamy tahini sauce, which flows, sexily down the violet volcano like lava.
There are too many delicious dishes to name, from chicken musakhan rolls - tender as a baby in tangy sumac - to spiced wagyu or chicken shawarma in crispy pita pockets, and the Somewhere Fatteh - which neatly describes myself, at this point, and is filled with aubergine, crispy potato, pine nuts, yoghurt and shoestring fries.
But a moment of silence is needed for the Japanese shrimp, rolled in kunafa - a crunchy and buttery shredded filo. Phwoar.
Top trouser buttons are loosened, but our table cannot refuse the show-stopping desserts, when they arrive.
The Cerelac Umm Ali would provide comfort through an apocalypse - a warm, sweet and creamy oven-baked bread pudding, gurgling with Cerelac milk.
There are also enormous, sharing Kunafa Croissants, which ooze with gooey, creamy cheese as they are torn apart and are topped with syrup and sugar.
Before we leave, we rummage through our Harrods’ goodie bag and discover beautiful, golden compasses, engraved with Somewhere. We decide that this will be helpful to find our way out of Harrods’ opulent labyrinth, and that we would also be very happy if all compasses led us Somewhere.
Somewhere Cafe, Fourth Floor, Harrods, 87-135 Brompton Road, Knightsbridge, London SW1X 7XL
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